This great story came in last week from my dear friend in Ontario:
Lee, Newfoundlanders get razzed a great deal in Canada. They’re wonderful folk, with an amazing dialect (one of the few left in Canada) and in general, a sunny outlook on life, but for some reason, they’re the butt of a truly astonishing number of jokes. Luckily, they seem to take it all in good fun. Here’s the latest:
Gotta luv them Newfies. They come up with the simplest, most practical – and logical - solutions. Maybe they should be running the country...
Each Friday night after work, sun, snow or rain, Jack, being a Newfie, would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a moose steak. But all of Jack's neighbours were Catholic. And since it was Lent, they were forbidden to eat meat on Friday. The delicious aroma from the grilled moose steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest.
The priest came to visit Jack, and suggested that he become a Catholic.
After several classes and much study, Jack attended Mass, and as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said: "You were born a Protestant and raised a Protestant, but now you are a Catholic."
Jack's neighbours were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the wonderful aroma of grilled moose filled the neighbourhood. The priest was called immediately by the neighbours; and he rushed to Jack's yard, clutching a rosary, entirely prepared to scold him. However, he stopped dead and simply watched in amazement.
There stood Jack, clutching a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat and chanted, "You wuz born a moose, you wuz raised a moose, but now you is a codfish."
My reply to her: Sue, That is wonderful! Do you think I could get someone to come here and sprinkle me with champagne and say “you wuz born chunky, you wuz raised chunky, but now you is thin!” ???
I can dream, can’t I?